09-14-2013, 08:55 AM
A Warrior Forum member (let's call him
Bob), dies, after a long life of upsells, downsells and everything in
between. Before he knows it he's at the Pearly Gates, standing in front
of St. Peter. St. Peter scratches his head and says:
"We
have an issue here. Turns out you've done EXACTLY 50% good, and 50% bad
in your life, so we don't know whether to send you to Heaven or Hell."
After a 5 minute deliberation with his committee, St. Peter continues:
"Here's
what we've decided - we're going to give you one day in Hell and one
day in Heaven, so you can choose yourself where you want to spend
eternity. We're going to start you off with a day in Hell first".
Before he knows it, the Warrior Forum member is in an elevator that
plunges downwards at incredible speed. After about 10 minutes at this
rate, the elevator stops; doors open, and he's looking at Hell. Only
it's not at all what he's imagined it to be! There's Casinos everywhere,
topless women courting him, drinks being handed to him - the works!
The Devil is at his beck and call, handing him anything he wants. "This is amazing!!" says Bob. "Heaven sure is gonna have to work hard to beat this!".
After a day of getting this royal treatment, he is ushered back to the
elevator. It flies upward at incredible speeds, and after 10 minutes,
the door opens to reveal Heaven. There's angels everywhere, everything
is white and beautiful, everyone lives in a massive mansions, and life
is very relaxed, loving and serene.
After a day of this, he is again ushered back to the elevator, which plunges back down in the middle, where he once again finds himself in front of St. Peter.
St. Peter says "Well Bob, what's it going to be? Do you want to spend eternity in Heaven, or will it be Hell?
Bob the Warrior says "Heaven was amazing, but I gotta be honest with you St. Peter - Hell was just a tad more my speed, so I'm gonna go ahead and spend eternity down there."
St. Peter reminds him that once he commits, there's no going back. But Bob has no doubts. "If you saw it yourself, you'd go there too St. Peter - I'm sure that's where I want to spend eternity!"
Before
he knows it he's in the elevator again, plunging down at incredible
speed. The door opens...but it's not the Hell he remembers from yesterday. Everything is brutally hot! The Devil rips him out of the elevator and throws him into a barrel of boiling oil, Bob screaming at the top of his lungs.
"Woa, woa, time out, Lucifer", says Bob. "I was just here yesterday, and everything was amazing - what happened?"
The Devil replies: "Bob, yesterday you were a prospect - now you're a customer".
Bob), dies, after a long life of upsells, downsells and everything in
between. Before he knows it he's at the Pearly Gates, standing in front
of St. Peter. St. Peter scratches his head and says:
"We
have an issue here. Turns out you've done EXACTLY 50% good, and 50% bad
in your life, so we don't know whether to send you to Heaven or Hell."
After a 5 minute deliberation with his committee, St. Peter continues:
"Here's
what we've decided - we're going to give you one day in Hell and one
day in Heaven, so you can choose yourself where you want to spend
eternity. We're going to start you off with a day in Hell first".
Before he knows it, the Warrior Forum member is in an elevator that
plunges downwards at incredible speed. After about 10 minutes at this
rate, the elevator stops; doors open, and he's looking at Hell. Only
it's not at all what he's imagined it to be! There's Casinos everywhere,
topless women courting him, drinks being handed to him - the works!
The Devil is at his beck and call, handing him anything he wants. "This is amazing!!" says Bob. "Heaven sure is gonna have to work hard to beat this!".
After a day of getting this royal treatment, he is ushered back to the
elevator. It flies upward at incredible speeds, and after 10 minutes,
the door opens to reveal Heaven. There's angels everywhere, everything
is white and beautiful, everyone lives in a massive mansions, and life
is very relaxed, loving and serene.
After a day of this, he is again ushered back to the elevator, which plunges back down in the middle, where he once again finds himself in front of St. Peter.
St. Peter says "Well Bob, what's it going to be? Do you want to spend eternity in Heaven, or will it be Hell?
Bob the Warrior says "Heaven was amazing, but I gotta be honest with you St. Peter - Hell was just a tad more my speed, so I'm gonna go ahead and spend eternity down there."
St. Peter reminds him that once he commits, there's no going back. But Bob has no doubts. "If you saw it yourself, you'd go there too St. Peter - I'm sure that's where I want to spend eternity!"
Before
he knows it he's in the elevator again, plunging down at incredible
speed. The door opens...but it's not the Hell he remembers from yesterday. Everything is brutally hot! The Devil rips him out of the elevator and throws him into a barrel of boiling oil, Bob screaming at the top of his lungs.
"Woa, woa, time out, Lucifer", says Bob. "I was just here yesterday, and everything was amazing - what happened?"
The Devil replies: "Bob, yesterday you were a prospect - now you're a customer".
this is a very very funny joke. But yeah it's reality. Now he has to feel like a buyer in WF.
